Your life can be made into your fantasy. All you have to do is imagine yourself in a store filled with masks, and you can pick anyone at any time and open up a whole new way of thinking with whoever you decide to be, as and when you wish to do so. A mask does not necessarily mean a tool to hide behind but a new beginning with the new you.
I had coffee with a lady I knew from many years ago and whom I bumped into in the Arts Club last week.
That afternoon, we barely said hello before she began complaining about how hard marriage is, how selfish men are, etc. Obviously rather stressed out. It brought back memories of my past. I did not even want to go down the line of thinking about how anyone in my company felt when I expressed dissatisfaction. Then again, I was probably associating with a different group of people than my present entourage in similar situations. Relationships are not easy, and my friends at the time listened patiently and understandably, as did I on that afternoon.
I realised why we had to meet again. My advice to her was:
"There's a way out of this, and I'm not talking about divorce. You've been married for so many years. Every relationship needs work, be it with your spouse, mother, son or the friends we make along the way. You can't change anyone, but you can change yourself. Try not to let what your husband does bother you. It takes a lot of work to begin. Everything takes practice."
I did try to introduce therapy and the self-development courses that helped me, as in Landmark Forum, which was personally a breakthrough of old habits, acquiring new ones for a better way of living a fulfilled life. But when I mentioned the fourteen-hour-a-day sessions for three days to begin and four days for the Advanced course, my friend was not convinced she could do that.
How can such sound advice go to waste? Easily. The fear of change is an obstacle one must overcome before making adequate alterations. And yet, change is vital if we want to move on to greener pastures.
We can be so set in our mind to be blinded by the corners of the four walls surrounding us, be it the walls of our homes or our minds. Well, I tried, but one has to get in a desperate state of yearning for change to do something about it.
Another visit to the Arts Club with Aisha was a joyful evening. As we stood by the bar to order our drinks, I noticed the tall figure of Prince Harry standing close by. The boy is adorable with that smile, accompanied by Graham Norton (who hosts a TV show in the UK). I had to stop going straight over to kiss him on the cheek! All I heard him say to a couple he was introduced to was:
"I'm already banned from going to that club!"
Cute.
Saturday night was yet another social call at Fabric! Again. I indeed had some magical times in that club with the friends I made there. I kept looking around me, dancing and chit-chatting with some of the most gorgeous young crowd God could have possibly created, the brightest of minds. I was in total bliss. Marco Carola (or Marco Polo as I called him when I couldn't remember his second name) rocked it till 10am. I was given a staff, Fabric Rockstar band, to get into the DJ booths. It sure was another fantastic night and morning.
The next day, a friend who was present in Fabric, Greko, Facebooked me and mentioned:
'Haldita, the last time I saw you in the VIP this morning, you were accompanied by an Italian Armani model!'
It made me smile as I knew exactly who he was talking about the absolutely divine brothers who looked after me so lovingly, amongst others.
I managed three hours of sleep Sunday afternoon, then got ready to be on time for dinner at Alain and Romel's, given in celebration of Aisha's birthday. Their heavenly home was warm and inviting with the lit candles everywhere; the delicious dinner and the company of Aisha's and Pedro's friends was a delight. They were amazed at how I managed to make it after a heavy night of dancing, but again, the love I feel from everyone around me keeps me going like a Duracell battery!
I got somewhat emotional when a newlywed couple expressed how they had worked through their differences and began a new honeymoon period. When I mentioned my prayers for their happiness, Hessa was surprised at my remark.
"Really Haldita? Did you pray for us?"
"Only God knows what I did anyway. Nothing makes me happier than to see people find happiness together."
And today, I had to attend a three-hour course on Speed Awareness! Why? Because I got three speeding tickets this summer. Oh dear. No good. Considering all the years of driving worldwide and being dumped with three tickets in two months.
At the course, I almost fell asleep twice when I saw the speaker standing above, waiting for me to answer a question she had asked during my nap.
It was not an easy day as I had to call the plumber again to fix the toilet. My car, which had been MOTed last week, needed more oil signs. To add to my reckless day, I fell on the wooden floor on one knee and slid across the corridor, banging my left fingers on the skirting. Ouch! I can barely type from the pain, but the pain is a matter of the mind as long as nothing is broken. When enduring physical pain in the past, my body became numb to it after a while, and I have worked through the scars in my mind as of the cause. No pain, no gain. Although I'm still determining what I gained from the fall!
No one said life was easy, and you bet it ain't. The main thing is that I learned my lessons well, and the new world that opened up as a result is one that I would not change with anyone, anywhere.
Going through life's masquerade, every mask I pick has a big smile.
I had coffee with a lady I knew from many years ago and whom I bumped into in the Arts Club last week.
That afternoon, we barely said hello before she began complaining about how hard marriage is, how selfish men are, etc. Obviously rather stressed out. It brought back memories of my past. I did not even want to go down the line of thinking about how anyone in my company felt when I expressed dissatisfaction. Then again, I was probably associating with a different group of people than my present entourage in similar situations. Relationships are not easy, and my friends at the time listened patiently and understandably, as did I on that afternoon.
I realised why we had to meet again. My advice to her was:
"There's a way out of this, and I'm not talking about divorce. You've been married for so many years. Every relationship needs work, be it with your spouse, mother, son or the friends we make along the way. You can't change anyone, but you can change yourself. Try not to let what your husband does bother you. It takes a lot of work to begin. Everything takes practice."
I did try to introduce therapy and the self-development courses that helped me, as in Landmark Forum, which was personally a breakthrough of old habits, acquiring new ones for a better way of living a fulfilled life. But when I mentioned the fourteen-hour-a-day sessions for three days to begin and four days for the Advanced course, my friend was not convinced she could do that.
How can such sound advice go to waste? Easily. The fear of change is an obstacle one must overcome before making adequate alterations. And yet, change is vital if we want to move on to greener pastures.
We can be so set in our mind to be blinded by the corners of the four walls surrounding us, be it the walls of our homes or our minds. Well, I tried, but one has to get in a desperate state of yearning for change to do something about it.
Another visit to the Arts Club with Aisha was a joyful evening. As we stood by the bar to order our drinks, I noticed the tall figure of Prince Harry standing close by. The boy is adorable with that smile, accompanied by Graham Norton (who hosts a TV show in the UK). I had to stop going straight over to kiss him on the cheek! All I heard him say to a couple he was introduced to was:
"I'm already banned from going to that club!"
Cute.
Saturday night was yet another social call at Fabric! Again. I indeed had some magical times in that club with the friends I made there. I kept looking around me, dancing and chit-chatting with some of the most gorgeous young crowd God could have possibly created, the brightest of minds. I was in total bliss. Marco Carola (or Marco Polo as I called him when I couldn't remember his second name) rocked it till 10am. I was given a staff, Fabric Rockstar band, to get into the DJ booths. It sure was another fantastic night and morning.
The next day, a friend who was present in Fabric, Greko, Facebooked me and mentioned:
'Haldita, the last time I saw you in the VIP this morning, you were accompanied by an Italian Armani model!'
It made me smile as I knew exactly who he was talking about the absolutely divine brothers who looked after me so lovingly, amongst others.
I managed three hours of sleep Sunday afternoon, then got ready to be on time for dinner at Alain and Romel's, given in celebration of Aisha's birthday. Their heavenly home was warm and inviting with the lit candles everywhere; the delicious dinner and the company of Aisha's and Pedro's friends was a delight. They were amazed at how I managed to make it after a heavy night of dancing, but again, the love I feel from everyone around me keeps me going like a Duracell battery!
I got somewhat emotional when a newlywed couple expressed how they had worked through their differences and began a new honeymoon period. When I mentioned my prayers for their happiness, Hessa was surprised at my remark.
"Really Haldita? Did you pray for us?"
"Only God knows what I did anyway. Nothing makes me happier than to see people find happiness together."
And today, I had to attend a three-hour course on Speed Awareness! Why? Because I got three speeding tickets this summer. Oh dear. No good. Considering all the years of driving worldwide and being dumped with three tickets in two months.
At the course, I almost fell asleep twice when I saw the speaker standing above, waiting for me to answer a question she had asked during my nap.
It was not an easy day as I had to call the plumber again to fix the toilet. My car, which had been MOTed last week, needed more oil signs. To add to my reckless day, I fell on the wooden floor on one knee and slid across the corridor, banging my left fingers on the skirting. Ouch! I can barely type from the pain, but the pain is a matter of the mind as long as nothing is broken. When enduring physical pain in the past, my body became numb to it after a while, and I have worked through the scars in my mind as of the cause. No pain, no gain. Although I'm still determining what I gained from the fall!
No one said life was easy, and you bet it ain't. The main thing is that I learned my lessons well, and the new world that opened up as a result is one that I would not change with anyone, anywhere.
Going through life's masquerade, every mask I pick has a big smile.
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