You don't need wings to fly... You need balls!
'To fly, you must let go of the world you are hanging onto'. Kurek Ashley.
Another two articles I read made me think deeply today:
1. Never waste your time explaining who you are to people committed to misunderstanding you. (I don't bother)
2. According to the Mayan calendar, December 2012 is the end of the world as we know it.
If we assumed the world would end, how would you live your last days on earth? All the worries about the future... Would you still put yourself through pain, judgement, misunderstanding, loneliness, and generally being unhappy? Or would you make every minute of your life count as the last? Enjoy every opportunity to be happy, surrounded by family and friends, or if you wish to be alone on a mountain or by the sea, so be it. Would you at least reach that dream?
Last week's evenings were filled, dining from Sushi to a BBQ prepared by Lukas on his houseboat, to Pantechnicon in Motcomb Street, The New Inn in St John's Wood, till came Friday's episode, which began on the fifth-floor bar of Waterstone's bookshop in Piccadilly. The last invite came from Youssef for a bite to eat before we headed to Momo's to meet my friend Donna for her belated celebration.
I got dressed in a cloche lacy skirt, cream top, a shawl, Parisian high heels with a couple of flowers in my hair, and I must remember the pink coat. It is supposedly summer in the constantly rainy London in July! As a flamenco singer was performing at Momo's later that evening, I thought I would dress up for the occasion.
Youssef and I chatted and laughed before I asked about his friend Adem, whom I had met the last time we had dinner in November. He smiled and answered:
"Actually, he is coming to meet us. Without THE girlfriend this time."
Despite my cheerful attitude towards most, he had gathered that I had yet to warm up to Adem's girl the last time we encountered her. He explained that their relationship had ended up messy and broken up a while back.
As we were conversing, Adem appeared distressed, followed by the mentioned girlfriend, her eyes fixated on him. Youssef gave me a glance with a puzzled expression.
Adem offered to explain: "I was leaving the pub on my way here when Berna (the girlfriend) appeared in front of me. It was such a surprise! Really, I was quite shocked."
And he did have a somewhat dishevelled look about him.
I, who seemed least astonished by the scene, then asked: "So, you just bumped into each other by accident? After a long break?"
Berna quickly corrected me: "No, there was no accident. I went there hoping to find him."
Oh, I thought, not a good start, but we left the couple to their intimate dialogue while we ate and chatted until the time came to leave. Youssef could not stop complimenting me on how I cheer him up whenever we meet and accept people as they are.
To cut a long story short, the four of us went on to Momo's.
Our hostess, Donna, greeted us, surrounded by her friends, and the lady flamenco singer began letting her passionate voice out into the dingy basement bar. I was mesmerised by the music and almost went into a trance. Once the lady finished singing, the DJ started playing some familiar Latino and Arabic music, and we danced as a group. Youssef, who had been a friend of a few years and with whom we always used to enjoy dancing in a duo, seemed preoccupied with checking out other ladies from our crowd in a very open manner. It is a free world, and I am not one for jealousy, but there is something called respect, and there is also disrespect. Now, the latter does not work for me, and I do not accept it from anyone. I was also tired and ready to depart, so I turned to Youssef and simply said:
"I'm leaving; you do as you please."
And on that note, I said my goodbyes and left the club upstairs to go to the outdoor area. Youssef, who had followed me up, asked:
"What's wrong, Haldita? Sure, I'll take you home."
I seemed to have raised my voice, without any notice to the diners around us and told him:
"We're friends, and I expect respect from my friends. Leave me alone if you can't see the disrespect you showed me!"
While we were deep in conversation, Berna appeared and butted in to say: "I just want to say goodbye. Adem is not even bothered, so I'm going."
She was looking around as she talked to us, and why did it seem like she was putting on a show?
We bid her farewell, and I continued on to Youssef:
"You just spent the whole night saying what a pleasure my company is. You're out with ME and still manage to piss me off like this?"
At this time, Adem approached with a glass of wine in his hand:
"My wife has found out, and I think I shouldn't see Berna. What do you think?"
My expression was no surprise, and as I began to advise him to return to his family, Berna's face reappeared from behind Adem, standing there listening! What a cheek, I thought again.
While I was feeling suffocated by all the agendas going on around me, a tramp walked right beside me and stopped to forcefully ask for money. Could an evening get worse?!
While almost shouting at Youssef, telling the couple to sort out their problems, I almost unconsciously saw myself shriek at the tramp, too: "Why don't you go sort out your life!"
He became rather aggressive in his words; I could no longer take my angry behaviour, nor remember the last time I got angry at anyone in such a manner! So, I left in a hurry.
The following day, I texted Youssef:
'My God, you brought the worst out of me last night. Could hardly sleep. Let's not be in touch for a while. Wish you the very best, always.'
Despite his text of apology with an excuse for being drunk and the difficulties facing him in life, I wrote back:
'Guess I felt disrespect and don't dwell well under such circumstances. Goodbye.'
I can disappear as fast as I appear. I show you respect; you do the same to me. That's all I am asking.
Thank goodness it was only Friday, and the weekend continued on Saturday with a visit from my PS buddies. Salar joined us this time for the spiritual experience of the Mexican truffle. The music was on, and we were talking amongst ourselves, which meant I did not quite allow myself to go into a trance and truly feel the depth of this philosopher's stone. After midnight, I looked at Salar and asked:
"Shall we do Fabric? I haven't been in almost three months!"
Salar replied: "Yes, let's. Haven't been for a while either."
And on that note, the cab was called. For me, it was like going home again. Haha. Starting with the bouncers who knew me, to the manageress and the staff who had not changed, all gave me the warmest hugs, with the same question:
"Where have you been, Haldita? We've missed you."
Aaaah. Frankly, I had missed all my buddies there too. It was not long before Salar and I bumped into Nyla, who had recently moved to London, her boyfriend Darius and their enchanting entourage of four others. We grouped to dance and chat together till the early hours of the morning. I was on cloud nine, enjoying the music and getting connected to more like-minded free spirits. It makes me happy to talk to a younger generation of bright, worldly people who understand how the world could be free. We did boogie our asses off till 7:30am, then made our departure back home.
One thing I have yet to mention is meeting Lance towards the end of the week past. You might have gathered that this was not just any meeting. After all the testing of words we had both passed, we met. At first glance, I was unsure whether I fancied him, but one thing I knew was that he had captured my mind through words in email and in text, and there was definitely something sexy about the guy.
Once we chatted, I realised how unimportant looks can be in some, whilst a tool of approach in others. Lance's conversation skills were so engaging, and his charm with a touch of naughtiness soon made me look at him in a different light. We are all souls, and the body we are here on earth in is only a facade of who we really are and what we can achieve with our behaviour and understanding. People can be impressive with an open outlook and a smile towards their fellow earthlings. Chemistry begins in the mind, through words, and if it continues to be physically as exciting, then who's to question what goes on?
Dinner with Aisha and Alain at Kateh restaurant ended a week of learning with a beautiful finish as we swapped stories of their latest travels and my adventures in the city.
A very exhilarating weekend and a week to follow. Not everything we do in life is 'right' or goes our way, as we wish, but then again, how do we know what we want is best for us? How else would we learn our lessons in life? Let us go with the flow, cherish every learning, and try to stay on top and happy.
Spreading Love and Joy is true Happiness. And if anyone doesn't get it... You know what to do...
Ciao.
'To fly, you must let go of the world you are hanging onto'. Kurek Ashley.
Another two articles I read made me think deeply today:
1. Never waste your time explaining who you are to people committed to misunderstanding you. (I don't bother)
2. According to the Mayan calendar, December 2012 is the end of the world as we know it.
If we assumed the world would end, how would you live your last days on earth? All the worries about the future... Would you still put yourself through pain, judgement, misunderstanding, loneliness, and generally being unhappy? Or would you make every minute of your life count as the last? Enjoy every opportunity to be happy, surrounded by family and friends, or if you wish to be alone on a mountain or by the sea, so be it. Would you at least reach that dream?
Last week's evenings were filled, dining from Sushi to a BBQ prepared by Lukas on his houseboat, to Pantechnicon in Motcomb Street, The New Inn in St John's Wood, till came Friday's episode, which began on the fifth-floor bar of Waterstone's bookshop in Piccadilly. The last invite came from Youssef for a bite to eat before we headed to Momo's to meet my friend Donna for her belated celebration.
I got dressed in a cloche lacy skirt, cream top, a shawl, Parisian high heels with a couple of flowers in my hair, and I must remember the pink coat. It is supposedly summer in the constantly rainy London in July! As a flamenco singer was performing at Momo's later that evening, I thought I would dress up for the occasion.
Youssef and I chatted and laughed before I asked about his friend Adem, whom I had met the last time we had dinner in November. He smiled and answered:
"Actually, he is coming to meet us. Without THE girlfriend this time."
Despite my cheerful attitude towards most, he had gathered that I had yet to warm up to Adem's girl the last time we encountered her. He explained that their relationship had ended up messy and broken up a while back.
As we were conversing, Adem appeared distressed, followed by the mentioned girlfriend, her eyes fixated on him. Youssef gave me a glance with a puzzled expression.
Adem offered to explain: "I was leaving the pub on my way here when Berna (the girlfriend) appeared in front of me. It was such a surprise! Really, I was quite shocked."
And he did have a somewhat dishevelled look about him.
I, who seemed least astonished by the scene, then asked: "So, you just bumped into each other by accident? After a long break?"
Berna quickly corrected me: "No, there was no accident. I went there hoping to find him."
Oh, I thought, not a good start, but we left the couple to their intimate dialogue while we ate and chatted until the time came to leave. Youssef could not stop complimenting me on how I cheer him up whenever we meet and accept people as they are.
To cut a long story short, the four of us went on to Momo's.
Our hostess, Donna, greeted us, surrounded by her friends, and the lady flamenco singer began letting her passionate voice out into the dingy basement bar. I was mesmerised by the music and almost went into a trance. Once the lady finished singing, the DJ started playing some familiar Latino and Arabic music, and we danced as a group. Youssef, who had been a friend of a few years and with whom we always used to enjoy dancing in a duo, seemed preoccupied with checking out other ladies from our crowd in a very open manner. It is a free world, and I am not one for jealousy, but there is something called respect, and there is also disrespect. Now, the latter does not work for me, and I do not accept it from anyone. I was also tired and ready to depart, so I turned to Youssef and simply said:
"I'm leaving; you do as you please."
And on that note, I said my goodbyes and left the club upstairs to go to the outdoor area. Youssef, who had followed me up, asked:
"What's wrong, Haldita? Sure, I'll take you home."
I seemed to have raised my voice, without any notice to the diners around us and told him:
"We're friends, and I expect respect from my friends. Leave me alone if you can't see the disrespect you showed me!"
While we were deep in conversation, Berna appeared and butted in to say: "I just want to say goodbye. Adem is not even bothered, so I'm going."
She was looking around as she talked to us, and why did it seem like she was putting on a show?
We bid her farewell, and I continued on to Youssef:
"You just spent the whole night saying what a pleasure my company is. You're out with ME and still manage to piss me off like this?"
At this time, Adem approached with a glass of wine in his hand:
"My wife has found out, and I think I shouldn't see Berna. What do you think?"
My expression was no surprise, and as I began to advise him to return to his family, Berna's face reappeared from behind Adem, standing there listening! What a cheek, I thought again.
While I was feeling suffocated by all the agendas going on around me, a tramp walked right beside me and stopped to forcefully ask for money. Could an evening get worse?!
While almost shouting at Youssef, telling the couple to sort out their problems, I almost unconsciously saw myself shriek at the tramp, too: "Why don't you go sort out your life!"
He became rather aggressive in his words; I could no longer take my angry behaviour, nor remember the last time I got angry at anyone in such a manner! So, I left in a hurry.
The following day, I texted Youssef:
'My God, you brought the worst out of me last night. Could hardly sleep. Let's not be in touch for a while. Wish you the very best, always.'
Despite his text of apology with an excuse for being drunk and the difficulties facing him in life, I wrote back:
'Guess I felt disrespect and don't dwell well under such circumstances. Goodbye.'
I can disappear as fast as I appear. I show you respect; you do the same to me. That's all I am asking.
Thank goodness it was only Friday, and the weekend continued on Saturday with a visit from my PS buddies. Salar joined us this time for the spiritual experience of the Mexican truffle. The music was on, and we were talking amongst ourselves, which meant I did not quite allow myself to go into a trance and truly feel the depth of this philosopher's stone. After midnight, I looked at Salar and asked:
"Shall we do Fabric? I haven't been in almost three months!"
Salar replied: "Yes, let's. Haven't been for a while either."
And on that note, the cab was called. For me, it was like going home again. Haha. Starting with the bouncers who knew me, to the manageress and the staff who had not changed, all gave me the warmest hugs, with the same question:
"Where have you been, Haldita? We've missed you."
Aaaah. Frankly, I had missed all my buddies there too. It was not long before Salar and I bumped into Nyla, who had recently moved to London, her boyfriend Darius and their enchanting entourage of four others. We grouped to dance and chat together till the early hours of the morning. I was on cloud nine, enjoying the music and getting connected to more like-minded free spirits. It makes me happy to talk to a younger generation of bright, worldly people who understand how the world could be free. We did boogie our asses off till 7:30am, then made our departure back home.
One thing I have yet to mention is meeting Lance towards the end of the week past. You might have gathered that this was not just any meeting. After all the testing of words we had both passed, we met. At first glance, I was unsure whether I fancied him, but one thing I knew was that he had captured my mind through words in email and in text, and there was definitely something sexy about the guy.
Once we chatted, I realised how unimportant looks can be in some, whilst a tool of approach in others. Lance's conversation skills were so engaging, and his charm with a touch of naughtiness soon made me look at him in a different light. We are all souls, and the body we are here on earth in is only a facade of who we really are and what we can achieve with our behaviour and understanding. People can be impressive with an open outlook and a smile towards their fellow earthlings. Chemistry begins in the mind, through words, and if it continues to be physically as exciting, then who's to question what goes on?
Dinner with Aisha and Alain at Kateh restaurant ended a week of learning with a beautiful finish as we swapped stories of their latest travels and my adventures in the city.
A very exhilarating weekend and a week to follow. Not everything we do in life is 'right' or goes our way, as we wish, but then again, how do we know what we want is best for us? How else would we learn our lessons in life? Let us go with the flow, cherish every learning, and try to stay on top and happy.
Spreading Love and Joy is true Happiness. And if anyone doesn't get it... You know what to do...
Ciao.
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