Fulfilled... Happy... Way to go!

Life is joy.
Life is great.
It is, after all, what you make it out to be.

The reason behind my happiness is a full-on life awaiting major changes on the line. The day I decided that not only myself but no one was ever going to feel sorry for me was a big step towards taking full responsibility for my actions, and here is now, the time to prove just that.
Only a few weeks ago, I was in the wilderness with a group of yoga fanatics, surfers, hikers, and then me, a party animal of the past. Out of all life's experiences emerged a new chapter of a strong woman with goals so ready to take on.  

Life has been going fast on a roller coaster at the speed of light!  
The end of May was night after night of laughter, re-kindling with old buddies whose humour was more engaging than any comedy strip could offer. Troy had us in stitches at home one evening, with the presence of Hala, Dylan and Mama, who had cooked us a delicious meal. There was Aisha's superb bbq, where Shane joined Hala and me to have a night to remember in the company of the witty Ranna, who was adamant about getting married in 2014, although her boyfriend seemed unsure. She said, "I don't know who I'll be married to, but I'm definitely getting married next year!"
It was all in the name of good humour, but then,  a gentleman unknown to us stepped in and randomly said in a slightly drunken, happy mood:
"Now... Why don't we all have sex!"
You can only imagine the look of surprise on all our faces with an ensemble of outbursts of laughter. His wife, who was amongst us listening, simply brushed him off with these words:
"Oh! Here we go, he and his sex talk!"
The guy got encouraged with his sex chat and carried on taking it to a higher level, a full-on comedy show of an outrageous nature. A fun party, especially with Aisha and Pedro's warm and generous hospitality, could only be great.

Last Thursday, Thomas, whom I had first met in Fabric and with whom I was celebrating his birthday not long ago with his friends there again, invited me to one of the opening nights at the Serpentine Gallery in Hyde Park. Every year, an architectural site goes up and stays on through until October, then dismantles to be taken away. Sou Fujimoto was appointed to build a vision of airy lightness amid the surrounding greenery this year.

The evening went on from there by picking Ernest up and heading to the busy Birdcage pub in the East End run by the one and only Andi Dj-ing on stage with Neneh Cherry, whose birthday I had sadly missed but managed to make it to her partner's at least. Seeing so many friends there through Ernest's introductions over the years was great.  

Despite the cold and pretty miserable weather we have been experiencing in London this spring, BBQs have not been short of hand. One at Robbie and Aari's with Aisha on a chilly evening protected by the fully leafed walls of their garden and another family Sunday at the Ex-in-laws was a good way of sticking our tongues out at the unkind climate.

Last Saturday began with an idea of a brunch picnic and ended in a gathering of good old friends at a pub lunch in Hammersmith by the river. The food at the Blue Anchor was not much to be desired, but the walk along the Thames and the semi-appearance of sunshine added flavour to our dissatisfied palates. We then headed towards Holland Park for a coffee and more of a spot in the sun. The queue of people standing next to the open-air café, all dressed up with picnic baskets, suggested a night at the Opera in the white-tented area nearby. Before the sopranos began, Robby, Dylan, Kerry and Hala all left, so Barton and his good friend Lydia suggested I join them for a sit down on the lawn of the park, close to the opera tents and soak up some heat before it runs away again. We did manage to find a spot in the sun through the overcrowded space, and since the singing barely reached us, my iPhone music took over the beats. When the sun finally disappeared behind the trees in the far, the cold air had arisen, and by deciding to give my friends a lift, the night continued to Barton's, where I got to meet Kathy, visiting London for the first time. The evening ended with a Persian meal at a new nearby restaurant to Barton's and then home.

Holland Park

Another view...

Since my return from Costa Rica, life has been 'non-stop', and if it had not been for all the exciting new projects keeping me up most nights, I would have probably felt the lack of sleep. Alas, none of that. The Stats on my blog indicate over 11,000 hits from every country I imaged possible on an Atlas; I have made prints of photos taken from various trips around the world on perspex and will be exhibiting them for the first time at Mama Brown's new unique concept space of an extravaganza of art, furniture and clothes gathered from all around the world, not to mention the delicious daily recipes of Aisha, to take place over the next five days, starting tomorrow.

'Passion Photography' is my theme, as many words can be spoken through the lens of a camera. Hence, 'Combining travels and photography mixed with words... There will be an outlook into my colourful world'. From designer turned tourist, writer and now photographer, life is all about crossing the lines of one's comfort zone and spreading those wings into the wilderness of the unknown. So much to be grateful for. Today, after finishing preparing the prints to be hung on the walls of Mama Brown's pop-up store, I made a getaway to meet up after 3:00 pm, quite later than expected, with Julie for a spot of tennis watching at Queen's Club. As we met outside the entrance and headed to court one, a drizzle of rain began, and the game was stopped. What's new, this being London! So, we headed to the bar for a glass of bubbly or two, and as the rain had not stopped, we continued to our reserved seats for afternoon tea on the grounds. Finally, we managed to seat ourselves for an astonishing game played by the tall Argentinian Juan Martin Del Potro against Xavier Malisse of Belgium. We almost gave up in the middle of the match but hung in to watch Del Potro win the three-set game.

The winner, Del Potro serving

Woohoo! The sun showed up at 8:00 pm!
End of game.

Oh my goodness, it's 4:00 am, and I need to sleep before the exciting new day begins. 

Na night, Everyone.

Stepping out of Comfort Zone at Chirriposa Retreat

"Our Greatest Strength Lies In The Gentleness
And Tenderness Of Our Heart."
~Rumi

Back in Costa Rica, another day, another bus journey began in the early morning towards the beach on the Osa Peninsula. This time around, we sat in the back seat before the pile of luggage and enjoyed yet another ride through the green scenery that passed us by. A stop at a café along the route and the first sights of the Golfo Dulce were apparent; the sweet Gulf indeed. By then, friendships had flourished, and I did not feel alone for a second.

The first sight of Golfo Dulce

Where Eagles Dared!

The bus finally stopped at a bar where our luggage was transferred in the back of trucks, with the group scattered in the designated carriers as that was the only they could have driven through the river followed by an uphill dirt road towards El Tumbo de las Olas which was the house we occupied for the rest of our retreat. At first, it was hard to believe we were sleeping on the first floor of an open house, set amidst nature at its wildest. 'Interesting'... I thought. On the ground floor, there was an open-air dining area with a large kitchen, which the local ladies making lunch occupied. This opened into a garden with a round pool surrounded by tropical trees, flowers, and hammocks hanging from posts. A wooden, open staircase to the first floor was covered by a high ceiling, partially see-through glass. No doors, no windows in sight.

The view from my bed

Walking upstairs to find the white-sheeted beds, only separated by heavy white curtains, reminded me of boarding school days, sharing rooms with inmates! Haha. It was as though time had stopped long ago, and I felt young, very young, a teenager lost in time. We each chose a bed, and Tracey happened to be my roommate, who was joined later by Charel. Next came lunch and a stroll down a pathway of trees and flowers which led to the beach and the blue Gulf, a bay of mainly sand with some stones scattered here and there, the varied green of the palm trees mixed with other lush shrubs unknown in the name (to me anyway) was breathtaking. While watching some of the girls go for a swim, I took a walk around the protected area, ending with large stones set at sea. A scene from a postcard.

We began days with yoga at 7:00am where our bubbly instructor Kenny G talked of Hindu Gods and Goddesses, their influence and learning while floods of tears flowed through most our eyes. It is incredible how connected we all really are. Beauty is found in nature as in people all around us; seek it, and you will find it. I would smile. Every time hummingbirds flapped, their wings hovered above the red and yellow heliconias during the lesson. Other times there were the naughty monkeys swiftly moving from one tree to another, there was the tucan bird with a giant yellow beak which diverted our attention and generally, the wild life in Costa Rica was next to none. It made me wonder whether birds could hear us or, like plants, they simply go by feeling alone. When words come out of our mouths, they generate a certain kind of heat, depending on the sentiments put into them.

We had surfing instructions from Tania on the first day, and people disappeared into the sea while all I wanted to do was lie on the surfboard and paddle away across the mellow waves. With all the Hawaiian Tropical oil on my skin, even holding onto the panel was hard work before sliding away like a slippery fish, but I loved it. Forget gripping on it to stand up! The dream of becoming a surf babe would have to wait for another lifetime... Or who knows?!

During our stay, the food prepared by Angus was more like being on a gourmet holiday, which was different from what I had expected. Especially the very yummy chocolate cake he baked for Molly's birthday was truly more gastronomic than most I had tasted before; I believe I have tried many. Tangus, as Tania and Angus' duo team were called, had gone to all lengths to make our stay fun-filled and fully scheduled. In the mountains, the massage by a local lady was exciting; in a netted room, before darkness dissolved anything in sight but the sound of the crickets and other animals and candles around, she began by expressing gratitude to all that surrounded us and asked permission from my body to work on. Also, she followed a similar ritual at the end, which I felt very much touched by. Then, in Osa, I booked an acupuncture session with the Chinese doctor, which was a healing experience; in the dark again, with the help of a torch on his forehead, he masterly conducted the use of his needles, which generally would freak me out.

One afternoon, we got dressed in our yoga outfits and hiking shoes to walk in the nearby river. I slid on a stone and fell into the water with both my cameras hanging in their cases from my shoulder to waste. Oh well, a farewell to my Canon G12, it did me well but the chip was saved. Nothing lasts forever, after all, but after getting to a waterfall and climbing the rocks to jump into the pond below in full gear, losing my camera became a thought of the past. Material goods are there to give us pleasure, and they are in our control. The minute we pay importance to them, it is them controlling us.

The last day was left for the 'crème de la crème' of all experiences, boating all morning to spot the dolphins. Swimming with dolphins at sea has been one of the most exhilarating experiences of my life. 'They are the only animals which can scan the human body', was what their coach had told us at a resort in Cancun, 'they sense you'. There are centres, especially in Florida, where swimming with these Godly creatures could help cure various illnesses or handicaps. As soon as the two boats our superb duo team hired were set at sea, three dolphins were spotted, and we got close to them before they made their way into the Pacific Ocean. After a ride through the backwaters and, thank goodness, not a sighting of crocodiles or snakes, we anchored at a beautiful spot for scuba diving, followed by a picnic brunch on board the boats. When we finally left to head back to the port, a dolphin appeared not far off, and when we approached the giant mammal, he decided to swim ahead of our boat, literally underneath. Kenny G brought out his flute and began playing a gentle tune, which would have probably even brought a cobra out of his nest. My heart went to Molly, whose mother had recently passed away, whose spirit followed her daughter wherever she went, sending her loving messages through the sound of the birds, the playful monkeys and now, the dolphin swimming with us. I had told her from my experience that when people die, they never leave you, all you have to do is think of them and they will be there to help, protect and guide you in simply a different way. You can feel certain physical embraces. 

Picnic Brunch

The affectionate dolphin

Once we returned to land, Angus was waiting for us with another car to transport us to the last yoga session at the Iguana Lodge, followed by lunch. I chose to skip the class and leave my camera alone on the beach, where I ended up chasing butterflies for ages. Phebe had told me a beautiful story she had once read about a woman chasing a butterfly for so long while where she needed to look was simply within.

Chasing the Butterfly

At last night's gathering, Kenny G asked everyone to express their most memorable moment on the retreat. The memory of the dolphin swimming along with us in harmony was the first thought that came to my mind. Charel shared her sentiments on how the beds were set out and how comfortable we felt in each other's company, the comfort one would think of with loved ones. When it came to Mandala's turn, whose striking beauty had caught my attention from the moment she walked into the dining area on our first night and talked candidly about her battle with cancer. At that moment, I could not help my outburst when I told her:
"You're so brave!"
Indeed, her courage to go through chemotherapy and then to come on such an adventurous journey on her own was truly remarkable to watch. Not only once did she show any sign of pain, if not the one she felt now, indeed the one she had endured. Amazing woman. I also told Kenny how wonderful it was to hear him speak so fondly of his bride-to-be and his love for her. It is quite a rare thing in this day and age.  

My time in Costa Rica was precious in many ways, realising that comfort zones are basically lazy chairs that we settle into and not a way to conduct a life full of adventures to be experienced and taken advantage of. Stepping out of the blanket of my comfort zone, from handstands at yoga to walks up the mountains in jungles, personally, what gave me more courage to try out new ventures was the caring support all around, which we do not always get in life, from our genuinely superb organisers, Tania and Angus, the yoga master Kenny G and every single person there. The incredible energy attracted people with varied lifestyles and ages from different parts of the world to gather here in Costa Rica to reconnect with our spirits and move on to a hopefully more meaningful life. Angus' warm hugs every morning meant a lot to me, and the treasured chats with Tania were sublime.

At one stage, towards the end of the trip, two days of rain and I was almost ready to go home!
What?!? It was only due to too much thinking. Despite carrying my laptop and having internet access, I could not write, put pen to paper, or read! Too much time to think is not necessarily a good thing, it would seem. God knows I was not complaining for one second, as counting my blessings constantly is all I do, even in the worst of situations, and this is by far one of the most magical destinations my travels have taken me to. 

Being back in London and spending time with family has given me a broader understanding of the importance of their love. I have not always been at my best behaviour regarding the awakening of the rebellion in me when asked to behave as requested. When told: "Haldita, you're a handful." I know exactly what that means. How can one take criticism when you know you are not pleasing someone and do not wish to change for their sake? Communication is only sometimes the key, as both parties have to agree first!
Watching the care my Uncle Ken puts into his excellent relationship with his loving wife, Aunt Laura, brought further hope in understanding how relationships can work. Also, having my mum A gel and sis Hala here has been another blessing I thank God for. Accompanied by my kids, life has been bliss.

Toxifying the detox of the yoga retreat with two visits to my favourite club, Fabric, with Sis on the last two Saturdays since the back was a pure pleasure. Getting home one morning at 7:00am to face my cool uncle reading in the living room made me further understand how important it is when one's family have an understanding far beyond their choice of conduct of how you choose to live your life. No criticism but tolerance. If you get along well with your daily routine, no one else will make your choices.  

Life is to be lived... God Bless.

Costa Rica... Que Rica Rica

Sow the seed of love and let it grow to touch every soul that crosses your path.

Goodness knows I try to stay on top of things and only travel paths that lead me to a greener and more positive pasture, but there are moments of feeling let down by others, which, upon reflection, goes back to the ego. Sometimes, I feel disappointed in myself and those close to me, so with this in mind, I booked a yoga retreat in Costa Rica to go on my own and see if I can yet achieve another higher level of being.  

On the second morning of our arrival to San Jose, the bus journey began at dawn after an early breakfast, which seemed convenient as jet lag had already kicked in. I settled into the front seat next to the driver and watched abrupt scenes of the capital as we drove by. However, once we left the hustle and bustle of the city centre, the scenery that followed was breathtaking as the green surroundings of mountainous roads began to emerge. Apart from a short visit to the Krama yoga centre, San José is still to be discovered. This time, the focus remained on experiencing the wildlife of Costa Rica in the mountains for three days and the beach for the rest of our six nights' stay. Hence, the San Isidro Valley was the designated destination in Canaán de Rivas, alongside the Chirripo River, where Angus awaited us with a deliciously prepared lunch for our hungry group of ten.  

At first, the diva in me awoke when I saw the room on the lower floor, too close to the wildlife which surrounded us, but upon reflection, the whole point of this trip was to further heighten my tolerance and acceptance of situations as they arose. Let's face it: my room was great, simply decorated with a balcony, a rocking chair, and views only the heavens above could provide; it was all lush green, with birds singing along and the sound of the river below running in the background. I went back to Tania, who was in charge of the retreat, and told her:
"Darling, I must be out of my mind to complain about my room. This is the whole point of me being here. Actually, I love it and am grateful."

On the first day, I walked down to the pool after eating; there was a chill in the air, and the clouds were hovering above. It was too cold to dip, so I settled on a large rock by the river, absorbing my new environment's beauty and sounds. It brought new meaning to the word wholesome. As I sat there taking in nature's artistry, Tania's smiley face appeared from the woods, and she sat next to me on the boulder while the beginning of our friendship started to shape. Soon after, it was time to prepare for a yoga session in a spacious studio with no windows but all open air. Our instructor was called Kenny G. Needless to say, I had not read the program and hence had yet to learn what to expect from the program nor this young all-American boy with short, curly blonde hair who seemed well rounded. 

This was another case of me booking a holiday as I had done in the past, checking in to the spa retreat in Spain last Easter on Juliette's recommendation, and getting there to find out I had booked myself on a boot camp! I truly enjoyed the following challenging week. Dare me into a challenge any day.

Everything I heard from other attendees on this retreat about Kenny G's marvellous method of teaching yoga was true and more. Despite the three times-a-week pilates reformer classes and boxing before travels, some positions proved strenuous. Although I began my first yoga session at seventeen, which goes back a while (long before it became fashionable), the regular practice has been far from my schedule apart from when holidaying in India a while back, then Spain and Bali the year before. After the two-hour class, another tasteful dinner was served, and everyone was ready to retire to their rooms. There were too many unknown creatures hanging around in the woods outside, including varied bugs, which I preferred to avoid getting too acquainted with; hence, going to bed was the only remaining option.

Meditation and Yoga Centre

Waking up early for the 6:00am meditation in the semi-open-air yoga hut was pure pleasure, as serenity and calmness filled the space with sounds of nature. Looking back at the lovely people I met during my ten-day stay, it took me a while to get to know each one as, at first, it is only an image of a person we perceive according to how we feel and not who they really are. Then again, it also has something to do with energy flow. 

On the second day in the mountains, we walked to the Jardines Secretos, only a few minutes up the road, and the guide walked us through this Secret Garden. It was planted with Bird of Paradise flowers of different kinds, orchids growing out of trees, water lilies, and many other plants whose names I only wish I could remember.

Colourful Secret Garden

Orchids growing on trees.

Most unusual flower!

In the afternoon, I was still not tempted to swim in the pool because of the chill in the air, so I sat on the porch and read while, every now and then, being distracted by the lush green scenery and the sound of the birds. As the sunsets were as early as 17:30, everyone headed to their rooms as darkness descended upon us after a healthy dinner. Even I went to bed at an unheard hour of 10 or 11pm! That would be after a cheeky cigarette with my new partner in crime, Kasey. 

On another early morning, we were loaded into the truck (literally), myself in the front seat (being older does have its advantages) and the others standing behind in the open, going on an adventure trail, a short drive away, to the National Park; Cloud Bridge where I barely managed to take a photo. If I had known the walk would be so challenging and mainly uphill, the choice of going might have been left out of my schedule, alas, there I was breathless trying to keep up with the rest of a very fit entourage. And so, huffing and puffing, I struggled. There, amid the wilderness, grew plants I had never seen before. The guide who stayed behind to accompany me towards the end of the trek (as everyone else was far ahead) picked a particular fruit from the tree, slightly larger than a pea and before he had mentioned the name, I picked some from the tree and sucked out the white, sweet and sticky gel-like substance with tiny black seeds. The guide said:
"We call this fruit mucus."
I would have spat the substance out if I hadn't swallowed it so quickly!

Even in Spanish, I knew exactly what he meant as it felt exactly that; yes, mucusy but sweet. Urgh! On reflection, though, I liked the taste, especially when he mentioned how much protein it contains and having climbed mountains (well, in my book), I needed all the energy coming my way. There were waterfalls almost everywhere we looked; the only shame was that everyone seemed in such a hurry that I did not get to enjoy the scenery that surrounded us entirely. Glad that was over when it was, and the few hours of ascending had left us hungry for lunch, a visit to a trout farm, where we fished for our meal, literally. The last fish I happened to catch for that meal was my first ever!

Trout Fishing in Costa Rica

Afterwards, Angus offered to show us around their home, where Tania and their cute kitten awaited us. Oh, how I admire people living amid a jungle, mainly in an open space where monkeys often pass you by on nearby trees, and seeing a panther or a snake is no risk to anyone. To live this lifestyle in the ten days I did was a massive step towards being free in more ways than simply in mind and spirit. In my book, this was getting out of any comfort zone imaginable.

A room with a view. And what a view!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Upon returning to the Chirripo Retreat, another yoga session was scheduled before an early supper. Afterwards, we returned to our rooms to pack and get ready for another bus journey to Osa Peninsula early in the morning. This time, the adventures followed us to the beach. 

 To be continued ...

 

 

 

Miami... Yummy Yummy

Life is a journey, and along the way, the inspiring people I meet bring more meaning to my life. First, I get to know each one and hear short stories of the paths they have crossed to reach where they are. Then, I realise how different their stories are yet how vulnerable we all are.

Two weeks away from my blog, while climbing another step towards a worldly understanding on an incredible trip, I got home yesterday (Monday) morning after an almost twenty-four-hour journey through three plane rides!  
First came the incredible 40-minute ride on a six-seater, one-engine plane from Osa Peninsula, taking us to San Jose's international airport. We did not even have to turn our mobiles off! The pilot simply asked us to buckle ourselves in our tight seats, with the smaller luggage in between each row of two people and off he went off the smallest runway I have ever seen. No checking in ... Nada (nothing as the Spanish say). I was thrilled at the experience and did not even realise Tracey, who was sitting next to the pilot, was handed the wheels at some stage to have a go at driving the 1976 plane, bandaged in some parts with masking tape; as my young travel companions Livia and Molly pointed out while deteriorating in their shades of white every time I looked back at them in the last two seats. I did, however, notice the propeller plane move distinctly in mid-air at some stage while the pilot turned towards Tracey, explaining something that could not be heard from where I was seated in the middle row. Honestly, I did not think for one second he would be giving piloting lessons to a beginner while having other passengers abroad! Oh well, they say, 'What you don't know won't hurt you'. So oblivious to all this, I recall asking Tracey to turn around and take a photo of us while she answered something in surprise that was best not repeated. So, I realised she must be busy somehow. My only concern began when I realised there was no toilet on board, and thrown into somewhat of a panic over that, I tried having a go at writing unsuccessfully, so the next best thing was to go through my Tatler magazine! My friends in the back row seemed to have noticed in surprise and took a photo!

Oh well, obviously, we arrived in San Jose safe and sound. After a three-hour recovery wait, the flight to Miami was exposed to more turbulence, far worse than the propeller plane experience, flying at 8,500 ft above the ocean, jungles, and some mountains at 8,100 ft only a few footsteps below us!  
The plane we were booked on went into bankruptcy only two days before our schedule, and this was the only option to get us to our outgoing flights on time.

The most exciting plane ride ever!

Flying at 8,500 ft. Could have almost jumped off the plane if necessary!

Back in London, before leaving for the yoga retreat to Costa Rica, I had the good fortune of meeting up at home with Jill one evening after an emotional last day at her present job and spending hours catching up on past, present and plans for the future to come. Discussing ideas with friends who understand your goals is always encouraging. The Friday arrival of my friend Lori never came to flourish as somehow expected, so instead, Kristel and I headed to Anglesea Arms' neighbourhood pub, followed by dinner at Patara's always pleasing Thai restaurant and home before midnight for a new Prince charming turning up with the right shoe at my doorstep! Thank goodness for the pre-travel waxing appointment earlier. Haha.
Saturday's birthday party at Dabbous was an invite from Sydney to help celebrate his special night with his partner Denzel and an entourage of their delightful friends, with whom I got the pleasure of mingling and ended a great night with the late appearance of Ernest and Kelly's superb company. I met two lovely sisters who were so loving towards one another. It was beautiful to see.

Monday was a Bank holiday, and my flight for a three-day stopover in Miami had arrived, staying with a dear friend, Clarence and his charming partner, Tiago. I had met Clarence years ago through Lady Saba in London, where I drove him to a house party and did not get him back home till after 2:00am. The latest hour he had ever been out, probably in his life. Then, I saw him again in Miami not long after, where he took me to a Christmas Eve dinner at a couple who owned a well-known dermatology practice in town. Only to call him two days later in desperation, where he accompanied me to that same couple's surgery to find out I had come down with shingles due to stress apparently. Me, stress?!? When we left, as Clarence drove me back to imprison myself in the hotel room for the following three or four days, he sang: 
"Shingle bells, shingle bells ... Shingle all the way!"
It was Christmas, after all, and my friend's sense of humour broke outbursts of laughter, which I could barely endure with the pain my body was going through. 
This time, I was staying at his magnificent apartment facing the marina in the Coconut Grove area. On my first night, as Zuma's was full, we visited the Shokudo Japanese restaurant while driving by the attractive shop windows of the Design District. The days were spent in various shopping malls with Tiago, where his patience must be fully credited with the hours spent purchasing Victoria's Secret goods and looking for hiking shoes, a headlamp and more gear to accommodate my next trip at a yoga retreat in Costa Rica. The cheeky stop at Misha's famous cupcake shop was naughty and nice.

Jet lag - Sunrise from my room

On the second night, Clarence booked a table at the outdoor Cecconi restaurant, set in the garden of the Soho Beach House, lit gently with Christmassy-looking tree lights. The only table not occupied by women or couples happened to be next to us of four men while we tried to figure out their sexuality. In a garden of mainly Eves, the Adams next door must have simply been 'very' married, as I presumed, as they were only interested in their own company. On my last night, my hosts threw a dinner party, where Tiago cooked a delicious Brazilian meal with red wine. The dermatologist friend of Clarence, who had diagnosed my shingles, happened to be single now and was invited to join an international group of their friends.

Over all the years of travelling, so many trips to Miami, from teenage days to family visits to Disney, the shingles episode, the most fun time with the girls' Pigs on tour at the music conference, and this time round, a very heartfelt, special period spent in the company of two amusing friends, each in their own extraordinary way, have helped open a distinguished place in my heart over this city. Thanks to the generous hospitality of my wonderful hosts, Miami has grown on me again.

Saying goodbye to Tiago at the airport was sad. Through an upgrade on the Miami flight to San Jose, I met Jones, who mentioned going to university decades ago in the US with a lady he named, who happens to be a friend of mine! What a small world we live in.

In San Jose, Conversing in my poquito (little) Spanish with the lady taxi driver from the Costa Rican capital's airport to the Hotel Luisiana in Santa Ana was a great way to start my journey. Once we arrived, Tania's warm welcome awaited me. Our afternoon began with checking in, meeting the few arrivals, and heading straight into a challenging yoga class at the Krama Centre. What did I let myself in again for?! An early dinner afterwards while I seemed in a haze as to who anyone was... All will be sunk in during the coming days...

I am back in London now, and my family is visiting. I am not sure where the time is going, but it sure is passing very fast, and I need to get over my jet lag and sleep!

My every cell is filled with the love I feel all around me, and I cannot wait to tell you what a life-changing experience this fun-filled yoga retreat was yet again. Until next time... Na night.

Confused dot com!

Life drives me to the entrance of my heart
Open to anyone who rides my cart
The joys only great friends can bring
Their love makes me want to sing
But best to keep my songs to myself
Mum said Honey, leave your voice on a shelf
Dancing is the profession I should have chosen
Alas, that thought has not been kept frozen
As I move my body through the flow of sound
Making buddies in a dark surround
Life has brought me love all around
While all my sorrows slowly drowned
Thank you all for enriching my life
The past is history, cut out with a knife.

I have no idea how that came about, but I sure enjoyed writing it during the inspirational meetings of friends, old and new.

Now, the week past has been full of... Well, everything!
Getting acquainted with my new iPhone 5 has been a piece of cake. The only problem was at the Pink Martini concert in Albert Hall, accompanied by two of my oldest wonderful girlfriends, Shiba and Bardo; I had my first run at videoing all the favourites they sang, but sadly, when I watched them later, nada! That is nothing. C'est la vie! You win some, you lose some. When the singer China offered the audience to go to the back of the stage to dance, my keenness to get there left my friends laughing yet unsurprised, and I went dancing right behind the performers. They sang in many languages and had the Turks and the Greeks on stage, microphone in hand, next to the lead singer. When leaving, I noticed two tall guys with salt and pepper hair right behind us, speaking a foreign language, which I had gathered was; I turned around and inquired:
"What language are you speaking?"
"Dutch," one of them replied.
So I continued: "Well, you see, they sang in almost every language except Dutch or Persian, and I'm so disappointed."
And that was how we left it. It was only Monday, after all!

Dancing on stage at the Pink Martini concert in Albert Hall

Finally, I got to eat at the Coya restaurant, joined by the lovely tall blonde Cindy. After a feast of the latest crave in Peruvian cuisine and a couple of their yummy pisco sour cocktails, we decided to go boogie a little. The Annabel's Club was the only place that came to mind on a Thursday evening, so we headed there. As soon as we walked to the bar, two seats emptied, and we decided to have one for the road in champagne. A young man in his late thirties approached Cindy and began conversing while I attended to what I do best, engaging myself in a favourite pastime of people-watching. A couple of well-dressed, brushed-up men arrived, full of attitude, with a series of blonde ladies. They were here on holiday it seemed and almost every blonde girl who passed by knew them, one of the guys in particular would grab their neck at the back while talking to them. A little crude I thought before he ordered another whiskey, while holding his head in his hand and downing the full glass already in front of him. The next whiskey arrived soon after, and he gulped that one down, too. Before leaving with his Barbies, he stood next to Cindy and talked next to her ear. She released his hand from her neck and returned to repeat the man's words. I cannot even get myself to repeat it as rude people should be ignored, but I grabbed his arm as he left and asked him to apologize to my friend. Knowing he was drunk out of his little brains, he mumbled something, and then I simply added: "You know what your problem is? You're a spoiled little brat, really!"
Needless to say, he looked puzzled and left. The world is a massive packet of 'all sorts'. Like the liquorish pack, sweet but somewhat bitter.
His friend, who conversed with us earlier, said, "Why are people so impressed with money? I go out with this man, and as soon as he approaches the girls I've talked to, they go to him and forget me."
Firstly, it is a matter of confidence that, sadly, money buys for some and gives them the impression that everyone is for sale. Who can blame them, as they are allowed to behave in that manner most of the time? But nope. It does not always work that way. Despite what Onassis said, "Everyone has a price."  Unless the price is kindness and love, it's wrong.

Venus' perfect man finally arrives!  @ Tate Modern

Last Friday, Robby and I had a date to visit the Tate Modern for an exhibition of one of the most influential pop artists, the American Roy Lichtenstein, who mastered a new concept in painting comic strips. We wore headsets and began our tour around the busy, grand white rooms, and by the third room, I managed to lose my friend. The dots of the large paintings got to my head or my eyes, and I began my search to find Robby, going from room to room trying to absorb what the earphones were talking about and concentrating on all those dots everywhere I looked, made me go dotty! Could not take it any longer, and as superbly accurate as the thousands of spots were painted, the room began turning around my head, and all I could see was more drops of vibrant colours. I will go back again with a clear head and not so high!  
However, one of my favourite rooms was one of 'War and Romance', where close-up female faces of despair, as in one drowning, would speak: 'I don't care! I'd rather sink than call Brad for help!'
Now... Aaaaah!  
Then came his 'Late Nudes,' in which he turned to the most ancient genres of art to demonstrate the female subject in a new and provocative form.
Dinner at the top-floor restaurant, with views of sundown over St Paul's and the city circling around the Thames, was breathtaking.  

Saturday arrived sooner than expected, and after a hairdo, dinner was at Lady Diba's, joined by one of her oldest friends and the two ladies, as always, enlightened me with their life stories of the good old days. There are still good new days to count on. Afterwards, Fabric was on the cards as Ricardo Villalobos played among other great DJs. However, Jessica and I connected as I called her by mistake on Viber, and she texted back. The conversation ended with me joining her first at some event on the southeast side of London. So, I drove to the Sidings Warehouse and found parking outside. Walking in, I came across the superb bouncer who used to be at Fabric before. He greeted me warmly, as always, and took me directly to the VIP area behind the stage, where the DJs were playing next to candles burning in large candelabras. Jessica stood out amongst the crowd, accompanied by a friend just as gorgeous and tall as she was, both in their highest glittering heels and little cocktail numbers.  
I automatically asked:  "Is that how you're coming to Fabric?" 
She replied:  "No. We're going home to change and will join you there."
So, I left them dancing and drove to Fabric around 3:00am.

Sadly, the girls never made it there, but it was not my first time going to this rave spot alone. Before long, I had seen many familiar faces and went to the dance floor to boogie. At some stage, noticed a guy moving like a dancing machine to the music, he was cute too and began his approach so we danced but then, things were getting too steamy just by the moves alone, so it was time to do a disappearance act. Bumping into Sébastian when going out to the smoking area was great fun, as he mentioned the after-party in a warehouse even further away than home. At some stage of the morning around 6:00am, Isabella who had asked me if I wanted to join her at Egg (another rave club) contacted me and as our text match went on, keen to see her after a long while, somehow I came to a conclusion she had come to Fabric. This is too funny not to tell ...  

Isabella wrote: 'Music is amazinggg here.'  
Me: 'Will you come to Fabric after? I'm here.'
Isa: 'Are u here?'
Me: 'Fabric. You?'
Isa: 'I'm here. Where are you?'
Me: 'Where are you? I come to find you.'
Isa: 'I'm first floor near the bar.'
Me: 'Coming up.'
Isa: 'No ground floor, Big room.'
Me: 'Ahhh. Coming down now.'
Isa: 'Dance floor big room. I can't see u.'
Anyway, this went on for ages, while I went up, then down, through all the crowd on the dance floor, as must have done my friend. So eager to find one another, we talked when I had finally gone out to the smoking area outside, and Isabella kept insisting they were in another tented smoking area when she asked: "Where are you, Babe?"
I answered: "Fabric. Where are you?"
"Egg."  She replied.
Never been so confused on half an E! Or have I?! Haha

Laughing aloud and slightly frustrated at the same time, I entered the staff room to face the super friendly Stéf, with whom we chatted, went dancing and who accompanied me while we drove to the Fabric after party at a very uncivilized hour of 13:00 hour on the Sunday. I sat on the balcony of the top floor warehouse where the event was held and laughed while watching Sébastian's dynamic moves and absorbing his super energy. Waited till 17:30 for Kalina to arrive but finally gave in and left the party without any goodbyes. There I was, breaking my records again of coming home at 18:00 hour on Sunday afternoon.  

London is full of surprises!

Okay, it's time for some rest now. Next Monday, destiny takes me abroad again. First, Miami, followed by a dream spot where I will attend a yoga retreat alone. That will be a first (the alone bit).  
May peace and harmony follow you wherever you go... 

Surrender All Control

And free your mind.
It was the lyrics of a song I have recently been addicted to, thanks to my brother Soltan.

Freeing the spirit involves being oblivious to other people's opinions and how they believe we should live our lives. It is taking charge of one's actions and knowing when a lesson will be learnt. Boy, I have lessons to share.
Recalling my youthful days, growing up as a child in a nation so involved in:
'What are people gonna say?' Or 'What will the neighbours think?'
It always puzzled me how engaged everyone is in living their lives according to others. The memory of the day being driven home from school by our driver with my cousins kept coming back when one of them shocked me with her remark:
"God will forgive you anything if you do your five times a day prayer."
"Really?!" I fumed. "You mean if someone kills another and goes on praying his five-time prayers, your God will forgive him?"  
She informed me: "That sure is what my mum says."

Now, even at eleven, the God I had created in my mind has always been a God of Love and Mercy. We punish ourselves. What was your dream as a child? As for me...
I have always loved chocolates. In fact, one of the cutest compliments I got was when someone called me just that, yes, chocolate when I got back tanned from a holiday. And as a child, my dream was to have wings to fly to areas where kids were deprived of them and throw them smarties everywhere. Weird, but true. In fact, in later years, I somewhat brought my dream into reality when, through a personal development course at Landmark Forum over six months in a Self-Expression and Leadership Program, my chosen project was to travel to Tehran and find out the names of five schools downtown with a total of six hundred students, through a government contact found by my Ex-mother-in-law. I then got back to London and organised a charity fair where friends partook; some baked pies, others sold their products and donated a percentage of their sales, and Christmas flower arrangements were made with the help of Sophie, where the money collected was sent back home for my friends there to buy six hundred pullovers, tracksuits, books and bags of sweets and crisps made ready in storage. I then contacted the government official and went back home to deliver the two vans of goods to two boys' and three girls' schools each in person, with three great friends joining to share those precious moments when the kids would go back to their classroom and sing happy birthday to themselves.
One of the most memorable days of my life!

At the time, I was raising two children and working hard with my then-husband (not that I have had any other!). Through years of therapy and workshops, I managed to make a childhood dream come true. It was the biggest blessing to have found myself, killed every unhappy moment of my life inside, put it behind me, and started afresh.

Tonight, I returned from the second Tuesday of another meditation course at the Dhyana Centre, accompanied by Fedot, who met me a month ago to discuss spirituality and its path. Funny as we initially met online some years ago, and now our then flirtatious rendez-vous have turned into meeting up for a different kind of satisfaction in terms of friendship. The worldly speaker was Alan, the most knowledgeable person in defining every type of meditation in depth and letting you decide which method to adopt for your daily routine. During the evening, a lady spoke these words:
"There's a lady who comes to our salon. When she first arrived, she was an angry woman. With the help of meditation and work on herself, in a matter of months, she's happier, and she looks ten years younger!"
Alan agreed and mentioned how thousands of people he knew had achieved that youthfulness through practice. Tears fled my eyes as I recalled when I first attended these courses some twelve years ago by an introduction through my Ex (to whom I was married then) and how, within six months, whoever saw me kept telling me just that:
"Haldita, you look ten, fifteen years younger. What have you done?"
And I am still being told that. Despite what most think, I am botox-free. There were two cases of liposuction I went through during my life; the first one was pretty useless as the weight piled on in other areas, and the second one was three and a half years ago, whereas I was told by two doctors afterwards that I was so lucky to be alive after. I bled like a cartoon figure through the holes of surgery every time I removed the scattered bloody baby pampers covering the wounds from the tight corset I had to wear for three months to shower, and this went on for a whole week before I decided to fly back home alone to London and suffer in agony on my own.
Never again! And please take care if you decide to do something so drastic. No one and nothing is worth the pain of almost losing your life.
Enough of that.

Now... how wonderful it is to go through so many changes and come out smiling—a true evolution. 
To kick start last weekend, there was more fun to be had in the great company of Don Juan. He came over and once again swept me off my feet as we spent hours of fun, listening to some of my great tunes and catching up on where we had left off. Boy, does this man know how to make a girl feel special!  
Learning to love without attachment is the biggest goal I have achieved in my life after meditation.

On Saturday night, Giselle invited me to a party, which was a fantastic event! The high-ceiling room with hanging decorations was filled with a trendy crowd of artists dressed in their 'Burning Man' outfits. G Iselle and I had much to catch up on, so we settled deep into the sofa and chatted while people-watching.
As my week had been super busy, Sunday was a restful day. After an hour's massage, I left for an early dinner with my wise friend Donna at Kateh's marvellously healthy yet rich Persian restaurant. Yummy...
And last night, as my excellent housekeeper had been poorly and not come in to work for almost two weeks, I was left hungry at home as cooking has certainly not been a forte of mine for too many years now to start again. Kim sweetly offered to come over and cook us a chicken stir fry, and we ate and chatted more about the power of positivity, which helps our lives take shape as it is meant to.

We are here to experience life and, through years of development and evolution, to bring meaning to it. Eaning of peace and love for future generations. We have achieved so many unthinkable goals, especially regarding technological advances. Still, a simple quest for peace and happiness deep within us needs much searching. Why? Time is running faster than ever. The 'we have all the time in the world' theory is only a concept as we know our time could be up any second. Live like it's your last moment on earth, and please smile more often; that alone sheds years off your gorgeous faces.

My life is super rich! No money in the world can buy that. 

A Thief amongst us in Marrakesh!

Well, hello again!
Now that the tales of Peru are past telling, how do I begin to sustain the effects of its enlightenment back here in London? The learning along my way is always the same; keep positive and smile.

It is challenging to digest today's news, which has left me somewhat distraught. Really?!  

A bomb exploded at the finishing line of a charity marathon? Can cruelty in humankind get any worse? The earthquake in Southern Iran is an act of nature, and however ruthless it may be, we must come to terms with it; it is out of our hands. But killing one another for whatever cause or reason is simply vicious. So, what makes these people come to terms with their actions and even think such evil thoughts? Is it a lack of love in their lives? How tortured are their minds? How different we are from one another.
Guess this is why I cannot bear the news. So sad. 

Life is not always rosy and posy. Let me tell you a story which proves just that.
Quite a few years ago, Hala and I decided to visit Marrakesh with Club Med, staying in the centre of town. The Medina, which uses facilities in their Riad hotel, is a short distance away. It was set in an almost deserted area with beautiful palm trees, the bluest swimming pools, and a great Moroccan-style surround.

We mainly stayed in the centre of town, close to the souk, where the morning prayers would momentarily wake us up. It's a shame the singer's voice was so untamed.
Our time in Club Med was fun as we made friends over the meals, shared tables with different people and made new friends. We did manage to spend a good deal of time at the souk, bargaining with ruthless vendors over the eleven pairs of Babouches we each bought, made in the softest leather of pastel colours and straw—never mind the kaftans! Sun-seeking by the pool was another chosen past time during our trip, as per usual.

We quickly became buddies with the excellent staff running the place and spent quite some time in their rooms chatting, smoking and laughing. By mid-week, while at dinner, we made the acquaintance of a father and son who were accompanied by a handful of older ladies at the table, all French-speaking. The son, Frédéric, looked like Mark Wedloe, playing the young boy in Gentle Ben (an ancient TV series about a cute child and his bear), but this one was only in his early thirties. He rapidly made friends with us and would accompany us almost everywhere we went. Within a couple of days, during supper, while Hala and I joked and laughed with Frédéric, the ladies were eying us with cheeky smiles and voiced their minds:

"Seems young Frédéric is keeping you ladies well entertained? Hey?"
They gave an exceptionally longer glance when their eyes gazed at mine. And, of course, I would not let them down in any way by denying that, indeed, he was, and we all laughed.

We had even introduced him to our friends who worked in the compound, and he seemed to fit in well wherever he joined us. The photos I took of that trip and the beauty of each sunset floating away behind the tall, picturesque palms will forever stay in my mind. Here is what happened next.

I must mention that the lock of the safe in our room was broken from day one. Despite my insisting on having it fixed, Hala had reassured me that Club Med was safe and that we could hide our jewellery in the suitcase and lock it. As far as jewellery was concerned, for some idiotic reason, we had travelled with our Cartier and Bulgari watches and a handful of 'stuff'—all real!  

The boy, Frédéric, had been to our room several times before going to dinner. At the same time, we finished getting ready, and by then, we had become such great buddies that we did not think twice before opening the suitcase's lock and getting out the jewels to wear. The boy's father, who had kept complaining to everyone about his 'useless' son not becoming a banker, was busy charming the older ladies until his attention drifted entirely to someone exquisite travelling with her young and vibrant daughter who wore headscarves in the most tasteful African manner; excellent for her white tone. When I mentioned how beautifully she carried it, the girl talked of her cancer openly and not for a moment did she stop smiling, floating around the place like a butterfly and sharing her love of life with everyone who crossed her path.  

Anyway, two days before our departure, Frédéric and his papa returned to Paris in the evening, and Hala and I offered to help him buy presents for his mother from the souk (market). After the deal, we returned to our room, where he carried an empty rack. I disappeared into the bathroom briefly but emerged shortly to accompany him to the lobby and head to dinner afterwards. I noticed the father exchanging numbers with the elegant lady, and we all bid them farewell as the bus left for the airport; somehow, I was beginning to believe there was something dodgy about the older man.

Once dinner was over, we returned to our room and noticed the suitcase lock open and a few items missing! Including Hala's gold watch, my two cameras (with which we had taken photos of everyone, including Frédéric and his father), and special Chanel glasses I had purchased recently. But my watch and other jewellery had not been touched. Obviously, we were flabbergasted! Without a clue as to who could have done that? We had stayed in Club Meds since decades ago, and never had we experienced such an act of violence. Once we talked to the staff, who had become good friends, about what had happened, they were all saddened and did their best to help us find who it could have been. They questioned their staff, and we felt deeply saddened not only for our loss but also for seeing the distress caused to our now buddies. One of the guys in charge, Ali, came with us to the police station to keep us company while they filed the robbery. If you think you have seen the most underdeveloped government department anywhere, this was undoubtedly one next to none. The station was merely a dry courtyard-like area on red clay ground, and the rooms around it were as primitive as time would allow, with a table and a few child-sized wooden chairs lying in what was otherwise an empty space. The 'sheriff' (what I called him Hala), who certainly had the air of authority, in the form of ego blowing out of his head, in a scruffy suit, looked us up and down and seemed least interested in what we had to say, while his male secretary arrived with a chair in one hand and a typewriter under his arm and sat typing away what he was dictated by his master; from one finger to another... Tack, tack, tack. Seriously?!

Anyway, the trauma which followed is something I prefer to keep in the history of my mind. We tried to comfort the staff, who were tormented by the saga even more than we were. It was only on the following day, after reviewing the past few days, that I began to doubt our friend, Frédéric.  But there was no proof, as I realised that when you deal with charlatans, they have probably tried their tricks on others and have become pros as of the process. He was the only person who saw where we hid the jewels, and for whatever reason, we had not locked the case from the night before, or he knew where the key was. He was the only one who had entered our room during that time with his empty rack sack, which he showed us before it was bare. So basically, shit can happen anywhere. I lost my photos, but frankly, such memories are best kept away, and by the time we had realised the truth back in London, we had no grounds to go by to let them know. I still sometimes wonder what the father had in mind when approaching and charming the elegant lady. God help us all from evil.

Life is not all doom and gloom. I thank God every morning for my health and the love that fills my days. Oh, finally, not only did I start a page on Facebook for my blog, but I also became a proud owner of an iPhone! Phew. Life's so much easier with Apple. Well, mine is.
Catching up with great friends kept me busy most of last week... What's new!
Thank goodness spring has sprung upon us, but before it did, suffering deeply from the cold that hit us recently, I picked a sunny destination to visit soon. What's new there, too.  
An evening meal at Zuma's with Robby and catching up on her news was an absolute delight as we talked of men and the bizarre lives everyone leads today. All the intermarriages, then remarriages following with off-springs in different ports, which is fast becoming a norm.
Thursday and Friday were dinner at the Arts Club in Mayfair; one night with the tall, blonde Cindy, whom I met through a work process as we became friends not long ago and the next with three gorgeous girlfriends; Ranna, who is the symbol of womanhood, Fifi over for the weekend and Kristel with whom we ended the night in the bar watching Simon Cowell walk in with his entourage of apparently mostly TV personalities as my friend noticed. Since I don't watch TV, I have yet to learn who they were, but they sure had a confident attitude about them. As in 'fuck me', I'm a celebrity! NOT. Haha. It was fun watching young girls from tables around pause as they stood beside Mr Cowell's table and flick their hair.

A family baby shower on Sunday made me realise how far away my days of baby talk were. So, I followed it up by visiting Troy at the New Inn for a few hours of laughter and getting better acquainted with Lila. It was not an early night, for sure.
The pièce de résistance came last night when a flow of excitement delivered Christofer to my doorstep. Dressed in the most womanly manner, which would have even made Marilyn Monroe proud, I finally remembered what it was like to live on my own again, being naughty in my own surroundings!  
Aaaaah...

Now is the time to bid you goodnight or good day as it may imply, and leave you with a thought from Dalai Lama:
'The mind is like a parachute... It works best when it is open.