Throughout the course of my life, the learning has been... don't hold grudges against anyone. It really isn't worth it.
The only person who will get hurt in the end is you. Everyone goes their own way in life and that's fine. Be a little more accepting and in a positive way, ask yourself... "If this were the last hour, day or month of my life, is this how I really want to live it?" So what is it that I really want to do now that could make me happy?
Oops! My mind drifted again... Back to the adventurous trip with the girls.
After we landed, Lola and I were directed to the door of a room the size of a Turkish bath, full of people. There were names being called by different customs officers for people to present themselves for questioning. We settled into two chairs left by an older English couple who seemed rather disturbed by the experience. We were eager to get this over and done with so we could join our friends. However, the waiting went on for over two hours before a stocky, uniformed black customs officer called my name. Well, let's say he tried to pronounce my complicated surname because it sounded more like Chinese to me. After the two-and-a-half-hour wait, there weren't many people left in the room so I stood up and walked up to him.
"So, you're Haldita." He said, with a tough tone, leaning one elbow on the desk with the palm of his hand on the table and the other hand pointing at me. I couldn't stop thinking of Goldie Hawn in the movie 'Private Benjamin'.
After a couple more questions he asked about the purpose of my visit.
'Would adventure count?' I thought to myself as he went on to ask: "What's your religion?"
My favourite question - which keeps recurring at various airports and I know is not allowed to be asked by law... But it does!
Turning my head slightly to the right, while looking him straight in the eye with a womanly charm, I answered: "Sorry Sir... I don't do religion!"
He seemed puzzled, so I continued: "You see, religion is a go-between. I don't do go-betweens, I have a direct line to God."
He seemed bemused and went on: "So you have a direct line to God... Do you now?"
"Yep." I agreed, smiling.
"Haha... I like you." He laughed.
"I bet you do... Haha." We seemed to get on like a house on fire but before he let me go, he took my credit card numbers! Yes, you read correctly, I suppose they watch the spending to see if I were to buy ammunition with my credit card!! Wha'ever. I made a request if he could see to my friend Lola who had been waiting so long and he did.
"Haldita," Came back Lola not long after, querying: "What did you tell the customs guy exactly? When I said I don't believe in religion, he asked... What, like your friend, you've a direct line to God too?"
So we left the airport laughing to join our friends waiting outside for the fun to continue.
We were driven to our hotel in the heart of the city. The arrival of four lively women filled up the silenced lobby. It was late so we retired to our three-bedroom suite which was situated so high that most of the beach could be surveyed from the balcony which had a large outdoor bed.
The next morning we started with breakfast. with the girls having contacted their DJ friends for guest lists etc, we were all tipsy by the time we got to the beach - feeling playful, taking photos and posing. Life becomes interesting when we go beyond our limits.
The memory that most capture my mind from the week that followed was the chaos of us getting ready to go out and dancing to some great tunes which needs no translation. Music makes the world go round and dancing is the best therapy for happiness. You don't see people dancing in tears! It is the essence of pure joy. So, one night, I left the club early and came back to the hotel alone to sleep. It was about 6:30am when I heard the sound of music from our living room. I went in to see the girls had got back with a group of DJs. Fabulous music played while we all danced on tables, on the balcony and enjoyed watching yet another sunrise. This was about making friends, sharing joy, quite innocent when you think about it and yet wonderfully wild.
When everyone left in the early afternoon, I went to catch some sun by the pool where I was promptly chatted up by some businessmen from New York who insisted I join them for lunch on the beach. So, I agreed. However, when I got back to my sunbed, I covered myself with a towel and fell asleep! I woke up a couple of hours later only to find the poolside empty! Guess I never made it to lunch.
We called ourselves 'the DJ groupies' Or at least I think that is what we were! Following djs and dancing to their tunes.
It was on the last day of our trip, that my divorce settlement was to be finalised by the courts. There were some mixed feelings of joy, yet I did spend some time alone thinking about my marriage. It was love that brought us together at a young age and we tried to make it work. My Ex played a vital role in my life of learning and we did spend some great times together. We are all here to learn and we each have an individual view of rights and wrongs ... Let's not judge one another for it. If something is 'wrong', the time will eventually come when we can let it go while staying at peace with ourselves. Amicable best describes that. I am grateful for those years. I could never be the strong woman I am now if it weren't for those experiences.
I cherish the good and the bad times.
The only person who will get hurt in the end is you. Everyone goes their own way in life and that's fine. Be a little more accepting and in a positive way, ask yourself... "If this were the last hour, day or month of my life, is this how I really want to live it?" So what is it that I really want to do now that could make me happy?
Oops! My mind drifted again... Back to the adventurous trip with the girls.
After we landed, Lola and I were directed to the door of a room the size of a Turkish bath, full of people. There were names being called by different customs officers for people to present themselves for questioning. We settled into two chairs left by an older English couple who seemed rather disturbed by the experience. We were eager to get this over and done with so we could join our friends. However, the waiting went on for over two hours before a stocky, uniformed black customs officer called my name. Well, let's say he tried to pronounce my complicated surname because it sounded more like Chinese to me. After the two-and-a-half-hour wait, there weren't many people left in the room so I stood up and walked up to him.
"So, you're Haldita." He said, with a tough tone, leaning one elbow on the desk with the palm of his hand on the table and the other hand pointing at me. I couldn't stop thinking of Goldie Hawn in the movie 'Private Benjamin'.
After a couple more questions he asked about the purpose of my visit.
'Would adventure count?' I thought to myself as he went on to ask: "What's your religion?"
My favourite question - which keeps recurring at various airports and I know is not allowed to be asked by law... But it does!
Turning my head slightly to the right, while looking him straight in the eye with a womanly charm, I answered: "Sorry Sir... I don't do religion!"
He seemed puzzled, so I continued: "You see, religion is a go-between. I don't do go-betweens, I have a direct line to God."
He seemed bemused and went on: "So you have a direct line to God... Do you now?"
"Yep." I agreed, smiling.
"Haha... I like you." He laughed.
"I bet you do... Haha." We seemed to get on like a house on fire but before he let me go, he took my credit card numbers! Yes, you read correctly, I suppose they watch the spending to see if I were to buy ammunition with my credit card!! Wha'ever. I made a request if he could see to my friend Lola who had been waiting so long and he did.
"Haldita," Came back Lola not long after, querying: "What did you tell the customs guy exactly? When I said I don't believe in religion, he asked... What, like your friend, you've a direct line to God too?"
So we left the airport laughing to join our friends waiting outside for the fun to continue.
We were driven to our hotel in the heart of the city. The arrival of four lively women filled up the silenced lobby. It was late so we retired to our three-bedroom suite which was situated so high that most of the beach could be surveyed from the balcony which had a large outdoor bed.
The next morning we started with breakfast. with the girls having contacted their DJ friends for guest lists etc, we were all tipsy by the time we got to the beach - feeling playful, taking photos and posing. Life becomes interesting when we go beyond our limits.
The memory that most capture my mind from the week that followed was the chaos of us getting ready to go out and dancing to some great tunes which needs no translation. Music makes the world go round and dancing is the best therapy for happiness. You don't see people dancing in tears! It is the essence of pure joy. So, one night, I left the club early and came back to the hotel alone to sleep. It was about 6:30am when I heard the sound of music from our living room. I went in to see the girls had got back with a group of DJs. Fabulous music played while we all danced on tables, on the balcony and enjoyed watching yet another sunrise. This was about making friends, sharing joy, quite innocent when you think about it and yet wonderfully wild.
When everyone left in the early afternoon, I went to catch some sun by the pool where I was promptly chatted up by some businessmen from New York who insisted I join them for lunch on the beach. So, I agreed. However, when I got back to my sunbed, I covered myself with a towel and fell asleep! I woke up a couple of hours later only to find the poolside empty! Guess I never made it to lunch.
We called ourselves 'the DJ groupies' Or at least I think that is what we were! Following djs and dancing to their tunes.
It was on the last day of our trip, that my divorce settlement was to be finalised by the courts. There were some mixed feelings of joy, yet I did spend some time alone thinking about my marriage. It was love that brought us together at a young age and we tried to make it work. My Ex played a vital role in my life of learning and we did spend some great times together. We are all here to learn and we each have an individual view of rights and wrongs ... Let's not judge one another for it. If something is 'wrong', the time will eventually come when we can let it go while staying at peace with ourselves. Amicable best describes that. I am grateful for those years. I could never be the strong woman I am now if it weren't for those experiences.
I cherish the good and the bad times.
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